Breaking free from a life of shoulds

If you were to weave a thread through my blog posts this year, you would notice the theme of living life authentically. This is something that I hold dear to my heart and the topic continues to re-surface as I reflect on my life. Over time, my sense of self has become more evolved - the last few years have been like living life with training wheels, testing the water, figuring out what I like and don’t like and learning to be accepting of who I am versus limiting my view to what I think I “should” be.

Should is a powerful word. In many respects, it can signal a source of guilt – a feeling that we “should” be doing something, should be acting a certain way or should be feeling something when we are not. Life is full of shoulds and it’s easy to fall into their trap.

But what is the source of the “should” and are these statements really applicable for everyone? Through my own self- awareness, I have learned that I may not always think, feel or act the same as others and I’m learning to accept that this is okay. There really aren’t any prescribed rules in life and by limiting our horizons with “shoulds,” we may be missing out on opportunities to live in a more authentic and fulfilling way.

Each of us has a unique internal compass to help guide our path, often times this is reflected in our intuition. I’ve learned that when I truly think less and feel more, rely more on my non-conscious brain to filter and process the environment around me, I find peace and serenity.

But quite honestly, in today’s fast paced world, with information overload and technology over-stimulation, it can be hard to slow down enough to really listen and feel the intuitive way. This is something that I find challenging more days than I would like. Yet, it’s in these quiet moments, when I am able to slow down enough to reconnect with my soul, to sense whether I am living authentically, that I have realized the freedom from releasing the “shoulds.”

I could drive myself crazy analyzing my life through the filter of “should,” but I don’t want that life. The future is not promised and opportunities become available unexpectedly. My life has been a testament of that fact. No longer held captive by what I should be doing, thinking or feeling, I choose to simply be - to do my best to live in the present, to enjoy each moment, to start each day with a heart of gratitude for the many blessings that have come my way and for the amazing friends and family that I am able to share my life with.

There is great fulfillment ready to be had when we can let go of the “shoulds” and embrace the present. And I believe when our heart is open to living authentically, in the moment, our intuition will guide us in ways that will be far more meaningful than anything we think we “should” be doing.